Prodigal sons. Or something.

It’s been quite some time since I’ve posted here.  Like many labors, it started with the best of intentions, and somehow — indulge me on the cliche — life got in the way.  I’m hoping to rectify that.  Writing for me is half-organizing, half-clarifying, and half-catharthic.  Three halves, you say?  That was entirely intentional.  It’s bigger than a sum of its parts.

I was away for many reasons, but primarily because I’ve been grappling with severe depression; severe depression that eventually put me into the hospital a few weeks ago.  It wasn’t a pleasant experience getting there, obviously, but it was a helpful one.  I enjoyed the hospitality there for ten nights.  While I’ve alluded to my depression and wrote about it before ages ago, I never wanted this space to be the writings of yet another guy suffering from depression.  Of course, the space eventually withered from lack of use, but now that I’ve come back, I think it is an important issue for me to write about.  It is a major part of my life, what makes me who I am, and if only one person reads this, says “yeah, that’s me, too” and feels slightly better, or not alone, then I think I’ve done the world a better service than endless musing about politics, popular culture, or whatever else pours from my fevered brain.  While this is not going to be my depression blog, I’m not going to avoid it.  If because of something I wrote one less person finds themselves on a bridge alone at night, staring down into the abyss, then all of this will be worth it.

One more thing.  There’s not just a mental cost to suffering depression: there is a very real financial cost, measuring in lost work hours, days in the hospital, and bills from clinics.  My hospitalization — in one of the best facilities in the country — did not come cheap.  My resources are limited and I’m not quite sure how I am going to pay for it, even if it was something that I required very much to survive.  So occasionally I am going to post this link — — which is a site that I’ve set up to help me with my medical bills.  If I write something that strikes you closely, moves you, or if you just want to help, you can click there to find out how.  If you can help, thank you.  If you cannot, I’m still happy you’re here.  I hope to make your time here worthwhile.




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